I really struggled to find ways to motivate myself to work with and for people who ask so much of their National Team athletes, and in return expect so little from themselves. And I did it all alone. I did it looking outward every day at all of my teammates who were happily unaware of the things I knew, and the betrayal I felt. They all could come to practice every day feeling good about what they were doing, and experiencing no conflict whatsoever about being involved in an organization which --for all they knew-- was working hard to keep them safe and protect them from sexism and misogyny.
It's been a long time since I've used this space. The past four years have been incredibly challenging for me, and I have retreated from much of the online presence I have maintained for a lot of my career. In the past I have been able to use my writing and the depth of the … Continue reading Untitled
It found me. For much of last year I was gliding along, smugly brimming with experience and wisdom, expertly dodging all of the most annoying and tiresome pitfalls of the post-Olympic year. It was my third one, so I knew everything I needed to know about how to not have a bad post-Olympic year. 2009 and … Continue reading the Post-Post-Olympic Year
This is my second season racing the pair for the United States. Over the past four years, I have spent more time in the pair than probably any other boat--it's our primary training and selection tool at the US Training Center, and for most of the 2016 quadrennium I had hoped that it would be … Continue reading the Superlatives
In 1513, Ponce de León landed on the coast of Florida near modern-day St. Augustine during his storied search for the Fountain of Youth. His quest was violent and exploitative, not unlike many early explorers' searches for wealth, power and immortality. Ponce de León never did find the Fountain of Youth in Florida--despite what the … Continue reading The Fountain of Youth
So it's finally time to stop sitting on this and publish. I wrote this post several months ago while I was still in Rio after the conclusion of competition. I haven't been ready to post it for a lot of reasons, but have been working up to it over the past week. The things I … Continue reading The Rio Blog